#i'm dealing with health stuff so i might be offline for a while | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

bbmyungho · 3 years ago

Text

group: wei

tags/warnings: junseo x reader, supernaturalhunter!au, horror!au, fluff, violence, SU*CIDE MENTION, mental health issues/stigma

“Hey, I think I got something." Daehyeon said, commanding the room's attention to him. I leaned my head on Junseo's shoulder while we awaited the words of the leader. "Finch asylum closed in 1957 after a string of suicides, started with a nurse, ended 10 patients later. Patients reported seeing the nurse and the residents after their deaths, nobody ever listened to them, so— they rioted. Several employees and residents died in the attacks, so they covered it up, closed down; 20 missing persons have been tied to the place since, no one ever found." Dae shrugged, peering up at the crew over his computer screen.

"Yeah, sounds pretty textbook to me. How'd you even find the place?" Donghan asked, throwing a plush basketball at Seokhwa and laughing at the glaring boy.

"A week ago, two teenage girls went in on a dare, never came out. The only way anybody even knows they were there is because of a smashed camera found onsite that apparently belonged to one of them." Daehyeon looked at me and Junseo, who was already searching for more information on the place as we spoke.

"Damn, I'm surprised it took a riot for this place to close down." Yongha muttered, looking over mine and Junseo's shoulders at the pictures he was scrolling through. I sighed, scanning the screen myself dejectedly: even when it was open, the place was completely dilapidated.

"Well, if we are going to hit it up, what are we looking for?" Seokhwa asked.

"Well, we could start with Nurse Shin." I said, pointing at a point in the article for Junseo to stop scrolling. "She was having an affair with one of the doctors, he didn't leave his wife for her, so she took her own life in the ward that she worked. Patients from the same ward started dying the same way within a matter of days; just me, or does it seem like this whole thing kinda starts with her?"

"Alright, Junseo, y/n, you two are on her. Yohan, Seokhwa, and I will try to dig up anything else about the riots and the people that died there." Daehyeon nodded. "Yongha, Donghan, I want you two to go talk to the girls' parents, friends, anybody that might know anything about their plans that night." Donghan clapped his hands and Yongha gave a quiet salute, heading off to go change into their suits and collect their "badges" to go play feds.

"Yongha and Donghan are home!!" Yohan called through the house, me and Junseo wiping our tired eyes and finally shutting our laptops to go meet the pair in the kitchen. Donghan was handing Yohan a large drink, Seokhwa routing through a bag on the counter when we entered.

"Aw, come on, they gave me the wrong burger." Seokhwa whined, pulling his food out of the bag and taking a bite anyways. "Come on, Yongha, I can forgive you for the vamp nest thing, but this? That's too far." He smirked, nudging the older man's shoulder playfully and dodging the light smack that Yongha turned to deal to him.

"Come on, can you stop with the vamp nest jabs?! I tried, and we all lived!" Yongha pouted.

"Yeah, thanks to Donghan." Seokhwa snorted.

"Leave him alone, Hwa." Yohan said authoritatively before he put the other boy in a headlock, jumping around the kitchen with him until Daehyeon grabbed his waist and lifted him into the hallway.

"Come on, people are trying to get their food here; I'm starving!" He exclaimed, accepting the burger I'd slid down the counter to him gratefully.

"So, anything out of the parents?" I asked, turning my attention to Donghan and a now pouty Yongha slumped over the kitchen table.

"Not really, just telling us exact times they left and stuff; apparently, one of the girls had a location sharing app on her phone that went offline about the time they should've been arriving in the gates at the asylum." Donghan shrugged.

"Interference." Junseo said, taking a bite of his burger.

"What about IDs on the spirits, any updates?" Yongha asked.

"Well, we know now that nurse Shin was cremated, so that leaves something for us to find probably in the asylum." I said, wrapping my arms around Junseo's waist from behind and resting my head in between his shoulder blades.

"And, we found out that the doctor she was seeing was killed in the riot," Daehyeon added. "Two-for-one special." He chuckled.

"Reckon." Donghan grunted. "Any idea about where he's buried?"

"That's... more complicated." Daehyeon said; Donghan motioned for him to continue. "Well, he was never found; not a lot of bodies were, at least not all in one piece, if you catch my drift." Daehyeon motioned awkwardly with his hands, earning a chuckle from Yongha.

"Most of the bodies from the riot, or at least what could be found of them, were cremated on-site in the asylum." Seokhwa added on his way to throw his trash away. "Alright guys, I'm going to bed early, my eyes are burning from staring at that computer for so long. I'll see ya' in the morning." He waved to everybody before making his way upstairs to his room, flicking the back of Junseo's head lightly on his way up just for good measure.

"Night!" Daehyeon called up after him. "Well, I guess I'll try to dig up some more on this place, just go back and double down on everything. If you guys are going to bed, make sure you pack your bags before you settle down so you're ready to leave in the morning; I want to leave early so we don't get caught busting in like that one time." He rubbed his face before heading back to his station on the couch.

"In that case, I'll probably turn in, too; I've read enough for a lifetime." He sighed. "I'll see you guys in the morning." He was met with a chorus of hums in response.

"Well, what are you gonna do, babe?" Junseo asked, turning in my arms and shooting the wrapper from his burger over my head and into the trash can.

"I think I'll stay up with Dae a little while longer, I feel bad leaving him in here researching by himself." I said. Junseo smiled and placed a soft kiss to my forehead, then to my lips.

"Alright, I'll see you in the morning, then." He said. I hummed in response, rubbing his shoulders lightly before we parted ways. "'Night."

#wei #wei imagines #wei horror au #kpop #kpop imagines

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rpbetter · 3 years ago

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Urgh. Okay, full disclosure, I haven't been on tumblr much over the last week or so, because I was one of the people that Raven initially called out after the COAR mess, and it was in the interest of my own mental health to fuck off for a while so I didn't stress myself out into oblivion. So I'm scrolling through most of this stuff for the first time, and talking to other people who were targeted. And pardon my French here, but I'm fucking disgusted at the lengths Raven has gone to assert themselves as a victim, how many people they've affected, and the waving around of something as serious as suicide for brownie points.

I have sympathy for people who overinterpret things in a strictly emotional and mental sense (actual reactions aside) because they lack the maturity. There's always a reason for that, and it's not their fault. And I have sympathy for people if they legitimately feel suicidal. That, too, isn't their fault. If I hadn't been blocked, I would've reported Raven in case their claims were true as well, because yeah, I don't mess around with that stuff either. But what's unacceptable is how Raven acted on those sentiments and behaved towards others, even after people tried to provide perspective. How Raven claimed to be done with the drama, but continued inciting it; how they claimed to be suicidal and had left tumblr, but wrote what amounts to a "fuck you" in their header and were still putzing around on their blog, and were apparently still editing their posts until as late as today; how they claimed to have deleted but only changed the url; how they weaponized all of this stuff and used it as a tool for guilt-tripping. Like, come on. It's okay if you're down in the dumps, but it's not okay to treat innocent people like garbage, and carpet bomb half the RPC. To me, it really feels like there was an intent to weaponize all of their hurt, offense, anger, and suicidal ideations, despite the possibility it did come from somewhere genuine, and that's so harmful to anyone who is actually struggling with depression.

Every time someone weaponizes mental illness in this way, it just makes people more and more apathetic the next time someone is genuinely just hurting, and saying they feel like they're at the end of their rope. And it makes people suspicious of whether those words are being used maliciously, or legitimately. That suspicion and that association is now there, unconscious or not. And every time this kind of stuff happens, the association gets stronger. What happens if Raven does this again? Some people will still report, but some people might just scoff and walk away - people who might've actually acted before. So in a way, that kind of behaviour impacts Raven as much as it impacts other people.

And you know what? They're not the only one dealing with serious shit. I've been suffering from MDD for the last fifteen years, and I've been in the process of changing medications and having little success for months. I've been going through hell offline. I have a shit list of people I want to yell at because they're dragging their feet on really important things I need to function; I'm constantly running a deficit on spoons. Until a week or so ago, roleplay was one of the only ways I could unwind. So for Raven to bully me by sticking that stupid post in my tags, because they needed to make a scene on COAR, which I was obviously going to comment on (like many other people), then to "like" an unsubstantiated callout about me and other innocent people related to that mess, it's only worsened my own mental health. It sounds melodramatic, but really. Someone else mentioned this too, but the fear of being in another callout, and the fear of that first callout somehow exploding, was in the back of my mind all week, despite being away from tumblr. So that was a little anxiety-inducing, much as I tried not to think about it.

And I'm debating whether to return now, or take more time off, and I have no idea what to do. Because that callout post is still in my blog's tag. I'm freaking out because I was planning on approaching some people to roleplay, which is something I rarely ever do, but now I'm concerned that I'll contact someone, they'll look at my tag to get an idea of my writing/partners/who I am, and see the callout post, and immediately dismiss me because even seeing the word "callout" on its own will send up red flags, by unconscious association with more impactful drama. And as long as that callout is up, these fears are going to be there.

That's just not fair.

And Raven's "apology" is completely unacceptable. Like you and others said, it doesn't reach anyone who needs to hear it, because they've all been blocked. I would fucking love an apology if it came from a place of honesty, but am I going to receive one? Probably not. And even for the followers who can still see that apology, it doesn't address anything. It isn't directed to anyone in particular. It doesn't mention the specific behaviours that were wrong on their part. And miss me with the "my intentions were good" part. No, they weren't; going around blocks and sticking shit in peoples' tags is vindictive and entirely intentional in all the worst ways, and shame on them for pretending otherwise, and by leading with such a poor example for many roleplayers, some of whom are in their teens. One of the people who tried to message Raven (they, too, were called out on Raven's blog) was speaking to a nineteen-year old who was completely clueless about the extent of the manipulation Raven was pulling. They thought all of it was normal and acceptable behaviour. That genuinely terrifies me. And while I imagine if Raven was genuinely apologetic, they would've gone to the callout blog and ask them to delete the callout post (attempt it, at the very least), somehow, I don't think that would've happened given all of their prior actions. God forbid something else is going on there.

Phew. Yeah, I'm angry. Maybe I'm just biased and tired. But honestly, I have a right to be. Raven's apology is a handwave, and they know it. It's a slap in the face to me, to you, and to everyone else who was involved in this clusterfuck. They're not the center of the universe. They affected real people, with real problems of their own. Anyways, I am so sorry for this, argh. Really had to get this out, and I didn't want to dump it on discord or somewhere else; I sure as heck didn't want to go to COAR with it. But hey, maybe people here will feel less alone if I added my own account to the mix. The more, the merrier? In a sense, anyways. Sometimes if you feel like you've been singled out, it's nice to know you're not actually the only person it's happened to.

Sorry for saving your reply for last, Anon. It's such an important one, I wanted to be properly thoughtful!

I think that it is going to make some people feel less alone, and there is always some relief in sharing one's trials. That might be especially true when one has been unable to share them anywhere else. It's not like you can address this on your own blog right now, COAR is definitely not a safe place to do so, it's a very isolating feeling that is made worse for having done nothing.

Coming back and being required to wade through this shit was really damn disgusting to me as well, but at least in my case, I had neither been obliged to distance myself for the sake of mental health nor was I treated to the sickening display of drumming up ideas of victimization from someone who victimized me. What I experienced was just incredulity and disgust, I cannot imagine how incensing this must be for you, I am so very sorry. If it makes me angry having a degree of removal and watching in it real time? What you're experiencing...there really isn't a single word to adequately encapsulate that, I'm sure.

You've still expressed so many of the things I've thought and felt. I found all that initial behavior uncalled for, shameful, yet another display of what's actually wrong in the RPC, but it was increasingly upsetting to me the more I looked into it because it did feel a little (a lot) too reminiscent of the sort of bullying experienced in person. It's really something else to be viciously picked at by someone who keeps upping the game until such point as it begins to cause them trouble, then get to be painted the wrongdoer and punished in some way for it because they're presenting as a sympathetic victim. A more sympathetic victim than you, that's really what I mean, I'm just going to say it.

And that was already in swing by the time I got from the launch point to the smoking crater of then current events. I got to Raven's again after bouncing back and forth between their interactions with others, largely from COAR, yes, and the shit on the callout blog...to see...everyone else being blamed in increasingly drastic ways.

Because on tumblr, unlike reality, if you throw out enough times ahead of time that you have disorders people can get behind, you're more sympathetic, not less. So long as one has set that foundation and has others to broadcast it once convenient, any horrible action one undertakes is given a pass. Anyone disagreeing, anyone not tolerating the abuse, is in the wrong now. In the worst possible way, of course.

This whole thing began with incredibly unnecessary bullshit and every, I mean fucking every, further action taken was a new level of fucked up, but the trivializing of and damage done to the perception of mental health and differences is quite possibly the worst. Are those things that need any more of that? It's already such a problem! I already see suspicion and fatigue with this, every time it's given validation, it grows.

Even if I wasn't mentally ill, with one of the disorders that gets vilified even on tumblr, even if I were not autistic, even if I never knew a single person who suffered worse than I do from the the complications they won by way of being born, hadn't anyone I loved that took their lives, this would be extremely upsetting to me. Using the idea that "whatever I do, it's got to be acceptable because I am X" while not caring that anyone else is X, Y, and/or Z. Weaponizing it for bullying and sympathy simultaneously. Way too much. Incredibly gross and harmful, legitimately fucking problematic.

I want people to be taken seriously when they choose to speak of the boundaries their mental health requires, I want muns to be able to say that they are having a difficult time without it coming off (even to the rest of us with mental health conditions) as a ploy for attention/guilting for whatever action they desire be taken by partners, and I want people to take threats of oncoming, serious harm seriously. How are they to do this, when it is continually used as tool or weaponized against others? At very best, it becomes another thing to ignore and scroll by on the dash.

As we've all had the misfortune to experience or witness so recently, once it is weaponized, it's a problem of priority. I've said in damn near every message I've gotten that Raven isn't the only person involved here who has serious shit going on, but like the absurdity with trying to spin an accident as transphobia, or having the audacity to attempt speaking from a place of peace in a way that might benefit everyone, Raven included, resulting in a callout about being against ND people...it doesn't matter. Doesn't matter that any of us are neurodivergent, have serious chronic mental health complications, or are not cisgender. Raven was swinging that around like a flaming sword to drive off bigots real and imagined before we ever got their attention.

Attention they fucking asked for.

Reblogging that post from COAR was just like posting those rules. The intention was to get attention, and it was asked for with extreme hostility. I have no idea how that is coming off to anyone as simply them defending themselves. It was a great moment to either not out themselves as the person in the confession at all, not engage with it, quietly remove the post, or to reblog it and take responsibility in a meaningful way at that point. Can you imagine what a difference that would have made then? If Raven had chosen instead to reblog it and apologize for doing what they had. Just that. No shitty, snide little comments about how they're sorry, but still absolutely correct and here are five reasons why everything they've misconstrued won't be tolerated. Just an acknowledgment of wrongdoing, an apology for doing so, and awareness gained moving forward.

Their decision to interact with that post in the way they did wasn't just more of the same nonsense, it was actively upping the game. I don't really care if it was intentional bait or just continuing to let malicious impulse run free, it was used as bait. Everyone who interacted with that post was effectively consigning themselves to harassment, and if they happened to interact on literally any other topic that group held a passionately opposing opinion on, they were attacked for it. Curiously, it became necessary for them to be harassed by way of the callout blog, but that is getting a little close to off-topic, so, I'll leave it at that.

So, while I initially really wanted to have the appeal to Raven work because their expressions of regret that I was greatly on the fence about being genuine, I'd say those flags were accurate. I cannot believe that someone who took every opportunity to do the wrong thing is genuinely sorry. Sorry for themselves, absolutely, sorry for anything they did, not so much. This constant narrative I got of "they SAID they were sorry" and "they apologized again and again and took the posts down," including from Raven, is incredible. On that last one, they, yet again, couldn't actually address me.

Appropriate response: messaging me or reblogging that post (you know, the rules snippet I found right the hell there still, despite the claim of it being deleted and the final catalyst of me needing to say something after I saw that, nope, surely was not) with the acknowledgment of a single thing I said.

Extra appropriate response: ^ plus going to everyone who could still be located that they harmed with a genuine, individual, private apology.

Inappropriate response that was had: new post, shitty, childish tone like they at once wanted to argue with me and didn't want to drop the act, restating of this apology that had already been deleted and meant exactly shit while it existed, restating of how they deleted this post and couldn't control reblogs, ignoring that I literally reblogged the original copy from their blog.

Apology neither believed nor accepted. Just as it wouldn't be if my nephew came to my house, broke a bunch of my things, said he was sorry while throwing the pieces at my pet, then threw himself on the floor screaming that he said he was sorry when I told him to go have a time out.

(Yes, I absolutely did just make a comparison to a child, y'all can shit yourselves again. It's not my problem if you want to misconstrue "this person's actions are not befitting of an adult" as "Vespertine said autistic people are children!" Fucking miss me with that. I'm an autistic adult who pays my bills, apologizes, doesn't treat people like shit while trying to excuse it by being ND. You're offensive with that shit, and contributing to the negative perception people have of those on the spectrum. Be a good ally today! Don't valid that! Free ninety-nine offer!)

Again, sorry for yourself does not equal being sorry for what you've done. The former can contribute to the development of the latter, but as I said in a response yesterday, there has been no display of that beginning to transpire. I genuinely hope that will eventually be the case because that would be the best outcome, the only "best" outcome at this point. Even if it was two years from now, if it did happen, I certainly would not be kind to people refusing them any such growth in peace, and I hope that, by some distant chance, I get to prove that.

But...stating "my intentions were good" over any part of this is not remotely promising. When? Where? At what point? Oh, right, when you took it upon yourself to label a random mun you took issue with. That's when your intentions were good. Then, when you vehemently needed to defend that point by callouts and individual attacks under the guise of it definitely not being about your pride, no! It was the defense of everyone else! Defending the community by carpet-bombing it, yes. This is not a "the path to Hell is paved with good intentions" situation.

I am so disturbed about the nineteen-year-old mun, my god. I'm telling y'all, my anger and disgust almost reach what I think is a pinnacle, then there's something new like this.

I don't even subscribe to tumblr's ideology that anyone under twenty-five is an actual infant who needs be kept in a protective bubble and forgiven for all bad behavior with infinite kindness, nineteen-year-olds deserve the agency of the adultier adults they are becoming, but it is a transitional age. Especially today. Most socialization and formative ideas take place online, and by the time younger RPers are entering the adult sphere of RP here, they've already got some really unhealthy ideas. About themselves, about others. There is such a demand for rabidly performative action that gets internalized, it shouldn't be being heartily fed by people in the community they might look up to.

At that age, someone like Raven is going to be a person looked up to. They espouse all the right ideas, and it's an age in which aggressive interaction over those things is seen as amusing and correct, no matter how wrong the actions taken are or the basis upon which they are founded. When these people foster an environment of cruelty for questioning, of course, that is not going to be the natural response. The response is now going to be the requirement of being told otherwise with adequate proof.

I have suspected that many of the hateful anons I've gotten were from Raven's even younger followers who feel like it's normal, acceptable, and that everything they're being told by Raven's sales team over at the callout blog is absolutely true. Of course, they're now morally obligated to come harass me for the things they were told I did! I think it's likely that several of the anons people got were from actual minors, which is so many levels of scary and irresponsible. Really great example all around, yes!

Because whether it is one's intention or not, that is potentially exposing minors, or muns who are still close enough to be more negatively impacted, to who even knows what. As well as violating the rules of blogs who do not interact with minors for good reason, setting those blogs up for yet another callout for treating someone they didn't know was a minor the way they did or having "freak shit" on their blog. Setting up the other party to be treated with full hostility as an adult would be. Very cool, very responsible.

There is just so much here that is unacceptable, I don't think people who were not directly impacted or have never had a callout against them understand the results, and that is one more unacceptable thing you've been good enough to talk about.

Even while taking a break from the RPC, it affects you negatively. Wondering what you're coming back to, your blog is no longer a safe feeling space, and there's nothing you can do to "cultivate your blog" to change that. They've taken away the ability to simply block and avoid others, the thing that keeps all of us comfortable here as well as allowing that to be all of us no matter how disagreeable we might be to each other. Callouts negate adult behavior. Callouts mean that one doesn't know where more potential for harassment might be coming from, or how long we might have to be worried about that.

It would be a major concern for me as well about what putting myself out there to new writing partners might bring. What the success of that might be. It's incredibly unfair that they've made finding new people precarious and more unpleasant than it can be anyway. That puts all of the future of your RP here in question, and if you're like me, just dropping a muse, picking up another, and moving to a new URL isn't going to be a good choice for you. It isn't that simple if you dedicate time to a muse for a long period of time, when that's the case, that's the RP you want to do and have laid the groundwork for.

I don't know if it will help at all, but it has seemed to me, over the past several days, that there are fewer people in the RPC who are inclined to believe or support callouts than there once was. I was hoping that was the case, since there is always so much interaction on my posts against callout culture, but until this crap went down, I had no idea just how many people are not positive toward it. It has seemed to be that the people who are inclined to listen to callouts are just louder.

I've also noticed that those people have the same set of red flags, so maybe sharing that will help you or others?

They don't have simple, basic, reasonable Do Not Interacts. It isn't simply asking that minors don't interact because the mun is over eighteen, that muns writing a triggering topic not interact, or that sort of thing. No, it's URL dropping of specific muns, outright links to callouts or "receipts," and an accusatory tone about any topics or types of muns who shouldn't interact. Such as "nasty ass proshippers" or "pedo apologists shipping incest."

Their rules are reflective this as well. A statement cannot be made that they do not write, let's say, toxic ships and left at that. There will be some morality wank present about normalizing or romanticizing toxic/abusive relationships.

There are less assured flags, but literally, anything that stands out as an interest in RPC or fandom-based activism as opposed to an interest in writing, their muses, or even their friendships with a variety of muns. I don't mean a rounded-out interest in things, I really do mean a glaring predominance of buzzword-laden reblogs and PSA's while they've not written a reply, headcanon, or answered a meme in months.

I'm not saying any of that because I feel like you, or anyone else's, judgment is terrible or that you're oblivious to warning signs! It's just that when we've experienced bad situations, it can compromise our ability to see clearly. It becomes easy to see a potential threat everywhere, and maybe that seems contrary, but it's then easy to fail to see real threats from those we're blowing up. We question whether we're being just as judgmental as the people who wronged us, putting words in other muns' mouths and thoughts in place of their own as was done to us. While we still are afraid to be wrong in giving someone an in to ruining our time again.

So, please, don't feel like I'm questioning your intelligence or speaking from a place of ultimate knowledge, never making mistakes in such a choice! I just really hate that you, and many others, are going through this, and anything at all that I can think of that might help you move forward from this utter bullshit you've been through, I've got to try to grab it.

Because, Anon, like all those sharing their experiences these last few days, you sound like the kind of mun we need in the RPC.

You're someone willing to share with others for the benefit of others. You're being honest about your feelings of anger and even the hopeless sensation of whether it's even worth it to try to return, having your progress on and offline stomped on, while still maintaining a sort of fairness and calm that I know is not easy. Because that's the mature thing to do, it's the right thing, and unfortunately, those are usually the harder things to do as well.

You did the right thing in expressing your opinion and doing what people like Raven's group love to be on about, can only do through bullying: not tolerating it. I'd hate for the RPC to lose someone like you!

Just as your message matters to more people out there than myself, I have no doubt that your choice to not quietly allow this behavior mattered to more muns than you'll ever know. I'm sure that none of them would have wanted this result for you, but so many muns have experienced such toxic, bullying behavior over the years in which not a soul spoke up.

Many of you proved something very important with challenging Raven and the callouts blog, that unlike them, it isn't necessary for good people to even know each other to do the right thing. They have to dogpile and engage in cliquish behavior, what they do isn't coming from a place of inner ethics and strength, but what you all did? It's the opposite.

So, not only do I thank you again for sharing and providing the important support of simply not being alone to others, I thank you for being the example to the RPC that people dealing in callouts and generalized shaming cannot be, no matter their platform.

I hope that, whether you choose to remain, leave, or take a very long break, everything you've been dealing with starts to look up. I know it's easy to say things made hollow for their repetition and flippant use, like telling you not to let them win, or that their bullshit just isn't that important. So, I'm not going to say them.

It doesn't work that way when you're dealing with mental health concerns! You can logically know that this is just petty bullshit not worth being run out of something important to you, but that doesn't stop the worry, frustration, or depression. You can have all the determination in the world to hang in there, even the spite to back it up, but neither is a match for the things you cannot control coming from your brain. That is the cruelty of mental illness on the very best of days.

You have all of my respect, support, and genuine sympathy that this happened to you. No one should be allowed to continually and unapologetically go out of their way to throw a wrench into someone's hard-won progress. You did nothing to deserve this, and the people out there worth interacting with are going to be the same ones who will have no question of that.

Lastly, I also hope that some of the anons sharing their experiences have helped you feel less alone, or like you're not just irrationally upset. Please know that you're seen and supported as well! And that you are always welcome to talk more, vent, share successes here.

Thank you, Anon.

#vespertine #answered #anonymous #long post #drama cw #rp harassment #callout culture

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metalempire · 6 years ago

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Hey so I'm gonna start Dark Souls either tomorrow or in the next couple of days, so do you have any hardcore pro gamer strats prepare to die tips on how to best get started with character creation and stuff?

pick either knight or warrior, theyre the two best starting classes for beginners. the knight has a 100% physical damage blocking shield at start which is incredibly helpful, whereas the warrior has the longsword at start which is a great beginning weapon. if you want to be a mage of some kind pick sorcerer for pure intelligence building, priest for pure faith building or pyromancer which uses both stats. if going for the traditional physical setup then just pick knight or warrior and level your strength, dexterity, vigor and endurance with some vitality along the wayuntimately you can specialise more in strength or dexterity depending on if you like fast or heavy weapons more, i preferred heavy for dark souls 1, but if unsure just level both stats equally since that lets you use most weapons fairly well. the claymore and longsword are great weapons for beginners. you might hear about the drake sword, it's good for the undead burg sections but once you beat bell gargoyles it loses usefulness since it doesnt get more powerful and cant scale with stats so if you do get it dont bother with it. make sure to practice parrying as much as you can in the early game so when you run into black knights you can parry them and not get 1-shotted. you'll know a parry is successful if you deflect the attack and the enemy is a little stunned. thats your opportunity to move right into their model and press the light attack button, if dont correctly you'll do a unique attack for massive damage. dont be discouraged if you dont get it right away, it takes alot of practice. only enemy of a certain size with weapons can be parried, no bosses in dark souls 1 can be parried.the game has alot of patience play in combat, you are going to need to carefully manage stamina so dont go wild on the attack and roll buttons, try to get a feel for when to attack and when to block and when to dodge. as you level endurance you'll have more stamina. its a somewhat slow paced game but you'll get the rhythm of it, like the opposite of a dynasty warriors game.once you beat the tutorial level you'll come to firelink shrine and can go to a bunch of places from there. if you go into a graveyard, get out of there until you've beaten some more levels, the skeletons are very strong and early game players won't really be able to deal with them. there's some good weapons in their area but you need to know the graveyard layout to be able to sprint past and weave through them to get them. similarly, if you end up in new londo ruins, dont cross the wooden bridge, you dont have the transient curses yet which let you fight ghosts and you need the artorias covenant ring before unflooding the ruins ideally. wait until after anor londo to do that one, just use the edges of it as a shortcut to valley of drakes once you get that far. for now just go to undead burg and work your way through until you beat two bosses: bell gargoyles, which lets you ring one of the bells and talk to a guy for the best emote, and capra demon, which has infinite sex appeal and gives you the key to the depths. when going to the depths, a warning, basilisks are black frog/lizard monsters that shoot gas at you, avoid the gas at all costs and kill them fast, the gad curses you which kills you instantly and causes you to be cursed with a permanent status effect that cuts your health in half until you get cured of curse much later in the game when you get the items or npcs for it. if you're unsure about fighting them just run away.blighttown is mandatory and it fucking blows ass, kill the toxic dart guys and they stay dead. humanity can heal you fully if used, but be careful about using it since its used to kindle bonfires once you beat pinwheel, which lets you increase the amount of estus you can carry from 5 to 10. once you get the lordvessel it can be increased to 15 and even 20. this only applies to an individual bonfire. the firelink shrine bonfire is always kindled to 10 at the start, so use it to your advantage until you're ready for the catacombs. once you beat bell gargoyles and once you reach the bottom of blighttown with the swamp, contact me if you want to discover where to find some secret areas, both of which lead to entirely other areas, and one can lead you to two optional boss fights. lost izalith is a terrible level don't worry everyone thinks its the worst area with the worst boss ever in a souls game. you will not be alone in not enjoying it. no one likes it. no one likes the boss of it either. jumping is dont by double tapping the roll button while sprinting. platforming sucks in souls but every game has you do it a few times. how encumbered you are effects how fast you swing your weapon, move, sprint and importantly; roll. if you are over 70% you are encumbered and you heavy roll, which carries you nowhere and has the least i-frames as a dodge. at below 25% (i think) you do the opposite where you run and move and swing fast and fast-roll which is a fantastic roll. anywhere inbetween is the standard medium set of animations, decide on how mobile vs how defensive you want to be and work towards it and get to know how you work. if you get the ring of favour and protection, it's the best ring in the whole game, but it breaks if you take it off, so you have to decide if you want only 1 free ring slot for the whole game, or if you dont want the benefits of the ring. this is a surprisingly hard choice for alot of players. pick the master key as your starting gift or you'll be fumbling around looking for keys for ages. i think you can even skip capra demon as well if you're struggling with it so long as you have the master key, the other items aside from black firebombs all suck anyway. the pendant literally does nothing and is an actual social experiment as indicated in an interview with the game's director, hidetaka miyazaki "git gud" means to play the game more, get more of a feel for it, observe and note things better and spend more time getting a feel for the game. if you dont like multiplayer too much and dont want to get invaded every two seconds by giantdads, just play offline, which can be toggled in settings. covenants are an online thing anyway, and you can dabble in that when you're more experienced with npc invasions instead. if you give 30 humanity to the fair maiden, once you beat demon firesage, you can skip most of lost izalith provided you can take a titanite demon on a bridge in a fight, which is as hard as dealing with the actual level itself. if you kill all the sunlight maggots hopping around the area before a certain someone gets there, they will be saved from the red eyed one. sen's fortress really is just like that. save this post to ur drafts you'll need the references. its hard to use character creator to make anything look nice just make kermit the frog or something idk everyone just makes memes in ds character creators.

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